Home again

We got back from Victoria yesterday early evening, and I have to say, although we were only gone 2 days, I feel like I've needed all of today to recover. I've felt just "off" all day today and couldn't quite figure out why. I've been unnaturally exhausted, jittery, and a little nauseas. I'm fairly certain it's from 2 days of junk food. It occurred to me that I ate like that for years and years (even worse, actually), and never did feel quite right. I used to have headaches all the time, get stomach aches for no real reason, and feel tired when I shouldn't. What a difference diet makes.

Poor little Guthrie needs to get caught up on sleep, but getting him to nap is a nightmare, and he's overtired so took forever to fall asleep tonight. I think I'm going to try to move bedtime a little earlier for a few days and see if that helps.

We had a great time. Victoria was beautiful. It is apparently a very old town, and once we got to the older areas, we realized we were no longer in Texas but instead were in the South. There was a huge area with beautiful old mansions, and the courthouse was gorgeous. The park - an enormous old park next to the Guadalupe River - had a small zoo, which we visited, a duck pond, a huge playground, and tons and tons of pecan trees.

I should mention here that Guthrie did not enjoy the zoo, due to his overactive sense of smell. I need to write a separate post about this issue. He didn't like the restaurant on the way home either and the smell of seafood.

On our way home, we drove along the coast and down through Corpus Christi. We stopped at a little restaurant in a coastal town and had a nice lunch - I had crab and shrimp fettuccine alfredo. (Another observation - portion size is out of control! My meal was probably about 8 servings of pasta. It was crazy huge.)

Eric did very well and enjoyed his time at UHV. He was on the local TV station (although I missed it) and in the local paper, too.

Guthrie keeps asking to go back to a hotel. Apparently he enjoyed eating Apple Jacks and watching the Food Network, since that was about all we watched. I think he's in love with Rachael Ray.

Took this picture along the coast on the way home.

ETA:

I should add that it has been the cutest thing in the world to watch Turner playing with the other little baby in the room, the little tiny one who is stuck on the other side of the full-length mirror, and to mention that later we are planning on all taking a nice little swim in the hotel pool. The outdoor hotel pool. Because it's 90 degrees, and so we can do that here.

Notes from a hotel

We're currently sitting in a hotel room in Victoria, Texas. By "we" I mean me, Guthrie, and Turner. And I will confess to being total bums and having brought along not only the laptop, but also the portable DVD player and a few of Guthrie's movies. The drive was only 4-ish hours, but we didn't get out of town until close to dark, and I figured what the heck, it might make it an easier drive for Guthrie. It wasn't bad, though - I actually had fun sitting between the boys, teaching Guthrie about nocturnal animals, making Turner's little teddy bear do crazy dances to Rush songs, and generally feeling like a Total Mom.

Eric is currently off at the University of Houston-Victoria, where he's doing lectures and readings and all kinds of fancy-pants stuff like that. There was no need for me and the boys to come, but to be honest, I was ready to get out of the Valley for a little while. Seriously.

We're going to go hunt up a park in a little while, after Turner wakes up from his nap and Guthrie finishes watching his Cars DVD.

In the meantime, I have to admit there are things I love about staying in hotels. We're total crunchy freaks (yeah, right) in that we don't have a TV (technically, we do - we own one, but it's sitting in our garage, where it will stay). We also eat a mainly healthy diet at home, and don't allow a lot of the normal average "Standard American Diet" foods into our home at all - sugary breakfast cereals, white bread, and the like.

On road trips, and in hotels, we relax most of our rules. No, the boys still may not have any soda, and we don't ever eat conventionally grown beef, but other than that, just about anything goes. On the drive home, Guthrie's going to get a bag of Cheetos, and I've already had two bottles of Pepsi. As rarely as we take road trips, and as well as we eat most of the time, I figure for a trip we should just relax and let the whole thing be seen as a treat. We also gorge ourselves on TV. Last night I kept trying to go to sleep, but it was almost 1 a.m. before I finally crashed, after watching South Park, "Iron Chef America," Jon Stewart and the Colbert Report. I just couldn't stop watching.

The good thing about all of this is that it reinforces to me why we do things the way we do at home. Aside from the gems of Stewart and Colbert, and the 5 million channels to feed me bizarre news addiction, TV today is CRAP. It was darn near impossible to find anything other than some form of "reality TV." And the constant barrage of advertisements, whether it obvious commercials or in the form of interviews and features on talk shows, was also inescapable.

I tried to find something decent for Guthrie to watch on TV. While I don't think (or even care) whether SpongeBob is gay, I don't like him. And it seemed like SB was on 24/7.

The commercials during the shows Eric and I were watching were scary too - "Ultimate Fighting DVDs," violent war games for your Playstation, or how about some sex, sex or more sex.

The hotel breakfast? Between the sweetened yogurt (but it's low-fat!), the maple-flavored pancake syrup (the secret, I believe, is fenugreek - I know when I took it I couldn't figure out why I had such a craving for pancakes all the time, because I smelled like freaking syrup), the 4 cups of sugared, creamed coffeine, and the toast with grape jelly (I loves me some grape jelly), I have a sugar rush to end all sugar rushes. Why can't hotel breakfasts have any substantial protein?

I guess I could have eaten a tub of peanut butter flavored trans fat.

So, off we will go soon to explore Victoria, eat us some junk food (I saw an Arby's last night - I'm having me a Roast Turkey Reuben. And when we get home - no TV, no crap food, no soda.

But I must admit, there was something addictive about Iron Chef. When it first came on, I couldn't quit laughing, and Eric just stared at me. It seemed like America had finally lost it, and this was proof of our impending doom: A food contest reality TV game show whatever the hell you want to call it. But I would be so addicted to this show if we had cable. A bunch of chefs, making venison taquitos, and rack of venison, and running around like crazy people throwing dried blueberries and pureeing apricots and avocados and who knows what else, in some crazy American competition to please a bunch of snooty pretentious judges. I LOVE IT! Makes me want to go eat some freedom fries.

Tagged!

I've been tagged to Know Thyself by Jill, but every time I've tried to do it I've been interrupted, so here goes:
What is/are YOUR:
Easy how-to ways to beat a bad mood? When Guthrie tells me to "chill-out Mom," a glass of wine, a bath and a book.
Never-fail lip color? Cover Girl ColorSlicks.
Personality type (via myersbriggs)? ISFJ
Greatest strengths and weaknesses (like in a job interview)? Friendly, warm, smile a lot, easily trusted, but sometimes not confident enough to trust that I can do something
Names of the trees in your yard? A pretty flowering tree of some sort.
Mother-in-law's favorite flower? Hah! Black roses? Those nasty smelling ones? Something poisonous?
Names of 4 friends whom you're going to tag? Abby, Callie, Karrie and Amanda, to remind her.

From Jill, again

So, the idea behind this meme is that you bold every one of these things that you've done and leave the rest in standard typeface.


01. bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. swam with wild dolphins
03. climbed a mountain
04. taken a ferrari for a test drive
05. been inside the great pyramid
06. held a tarantula
07. taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. said "i love you" and meant it
09. hugged a tree
10. bungee jumped
11. visited paris
12. watched a lightning storm at sea
13. stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. seen the northern lights
15. gone to a huge sports game
16. walked the stairs to the top of the leaning tower of pisa
17. grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. touched an iceberg
19. slept under the stars
20. changed a baby's diaper
21. taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. watched a meteor shower
23. gotten drunk on champagne (cheap champagne)
24. given more than you can afford to charity
25. looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. had a food fight
28. bet on a winning horse
29. asked out a stranger
30. had a snowball fight
31. screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. held a lamb
33. seen a total eclipse
34. ridden a roller coaster
35. hit a home run
36. danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. adopted an accent for an entire day
38. actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. had two hard drives for your computer
40. visited all 50 states
41. taken care of someone who was drunk
42. had amazing friends
43. danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. watched whales
45. stolen a sign
46. backpacked in europe
47. taken a road-trip
48. gone rock climbing
49. midnight walk on the beach
50. gone sky diving
51. visited ireland
52. been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. in a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. visited japan
55. milked a cow
56. alphabetized your cds
57. pretended to be a superhero
58. sung karaoke
59. lounged around in bed all day
60. played touch football
61. gone scuba diving
62. kissed in the rain
63. played in the mud
64. played in the rain
65. gone to a drive-in theater
66. visited the great wall of china
67. started a business
68. fallen in love and not had your heart broken (so far, so good)
69. toured ancient sites
70. taken a martial arts class
71. played d&d for more than 6 hours straight
72. gotten married
73. been in a movie
74. crashed a party
75. gotten divorced
76. gone without food for 5 days
77. made cookies from scratch
78. won first prize in a costume contest
79. ridden a gondola in venice
80. gotten a tattoo
81. rafted the snake river
82. been on television news programs as an "expert"
83. gotten flowers for no reason
84. performed on stage
85. been to las vegas
86. recorded music
87. eaten shark
88. kissed on the first date
89. gone to thailand
90. bought a house
91. been in a combat zone
92. buried one/both of your parents
93. been on a cruise ship
94. spoken more than one language fluently
95. performed in rocky horror
96. raised children
97. followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. passed out cold
99. taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. walked the golden gate bridge
102. sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. had plastic surgery
104. survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
105. wrote articles for a large publication
106. lost over 100 pounds
107. held someone while they were having a flashback
108. piloted an airplane
109. touched a stingray
110. broken someone's heart
111. helped an animal give birth
112. won money on a t.v. game show
113. broken a bone
114. gone on an african photo safari
115. had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
119. had major surgery
120. had a snake as a pet
121. hiked to the bottom of the grand canyon
122. slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. visited more foreign countries than u.s. states
124. visited all 7 continents
125. taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. eaten kangaroo meat
127. eaten sushi (yummy!)
128. had your picture in the newspaper
129. changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. gone back to school
131. parasailed
132. touched a cockroach
133. eaten fried green tomatoes
134. read The iliad
135. selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read
136. killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. skipped all your school reunions
138. communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. been elected to public office
140. written your own computer language
141. thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. built your own PC from parts
144. sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. had a booth at a street fair
146. dyed your hair (umm, monthly!)
147. been a dj
148. shaved your head
149. caused a car accident
150. saved someone's life

That was fun. Leave me a comment if you do it too!!!

Sleepless baby redux

Turner has definitely started following in the footsteps of his brother. When he was tiny and new, he was such a good sleeper, that I was certain we weren't going to have the problems we had with Guthrie. Even just a few weeks ago, he was taking 3 hour naps all by himself and sleeping for 2-3 hours, at least to start the night.

Now, though, I'm starting to get nervous. He has taken to waking up after 20 minutes for a nap unless someone is laying right there with him, and is waking up about a gazillion times every night.

Eric is convinced he is teething. I may try some Tylenol tonight before bed to see if it helps. I just don't want to keep him constantly on the Tylenol, but I really need him to have at least some short stretches of sleep where I can be a human being without holding him!

I have the No Cry Sleep Solution but those solutions certainly aren't for a baby with a toddler in the house as well. I can't just sit by the door and wait for him to stir, and then go in and lay back down with him until he goes back to sleep, and I sure can't do this every nap, every day, for an extended period of time. Not without Guthrie coming in to "help" or insisting at that moment that he needs a glass of soy milk.

Eric assured me that this will pass. And I know it will - it did with Guthrie. It just took 2 1/2 years for it to pass with Guthrie, and I have such a fear that it will with Turner too.

It's not that I'm sleep-deprived, because on that end I'm doing okay. It's that I'm ME-deprived. I need to have some time alone, or time alone with my husband, and I can't do that with a baby who refuses to sleep alone.

I voted!

We found out, last Wednesday when we (Eric went with us) took the boys to Story Hour at the library, that we were indeed registered to vote. We thought we'd missed the deadline, but found out that in fact we got registered when we got our Texas driver's licenses. I thought I remembered something about getting registered, but we never got a card in the mail, so I was thoroughly confused.

And so, since we were there, at the library and community center, which was our polling place, and they were doing early voting, we went ahead and voted! Yeah!

I'm not going to tell you who I voted for, but let's just say I'm BLUE! Well, actually, I voted for quite a few Libertarians, because in several races the only options were vote for Darth's minions, or vote for Libertarians. I will admit I was hopelessly uninformed about some of the races, because I didn't think I was registered. Shame, shame, shame on Judy.

It was my first time voting on a touch screen. Yeah, um, I have tons of faith in that system. It didn't even feel like I was voting, and who knows whether or not the thing counted at all. I just feel like elections could soon be decided by hackers racing each other to beat some clock. Call me a cynic, but it just doesn't seem right.

I did my part, though. We, sadly, didn't take either of the boys in with us while we voted, as we took turns, and one of us stayed in the library with them while the other voted. Guthrie's baby book has an "I Voted" sticker from the '04 elections, but I don't think they even gave them out this time. :(

And we won't even talk about the ridiculousness of the redistricting down here, and how they worked it all out so that the districts contain enough white people to keep white people in office. Makes it feel like none of it even matters.

From One Weird Mother

to another.



Thank you to Karrie. I got my package yesterday, but Blogger didn't like me and wouldn't let me post this. :(

Had a barbecue to go to yesterday, but I know what I'm having for lunch today! These look awesome. But, the spices (I've looked everywhere for the Garam Masala and couldn't find any anywhere) mean I now have to attempt to cook something more creative than Barilla Plus (Drink!) and veggies. And I've already started the book - I had it on my wish list, too.

BB Image of the Day

I forgot to post the link, and show that Samantha and Guthrie were featured as part of Blogging Baby's Image of the Day for Halloween. They did a little collage of pictures. They are the devil/angel and choo-choo train on the left in the middle.

http://www.bloggingbaby.com/2006/10/31/image-of-the-day-special-happy-halloween/

Talking Turkey(less)

Now that Halloween is over, we've been starting to think about Thanksgiving. A little early, I know, but I like to know ahead of time what we're going to do for these kinds of things.

Eric suggested maybe getting Cornish Game Hens, which actually sounded like a fun idea, but the way Guthrie freaked out in the grocery store yesterday seeing whole dead fish, I think that might send him into a panic.

I was thinking about it, too, and I think part of the reason Thanksgiving is such a big deal to lots of people is because so many people don't really cook anymore, and then on Thanksgiving they go all out and cook a huge feast. We, on the other hand, cook all the time. There is constantly the smell of some food in our house - beans on the stove, bread in the machine, cookies in the oven, or bacon in the frying pan. (Let's not talk about our recent bacon fetish. That combined with the candy and I've actually managed to gain 3 pounds!)

My suggestion, which Eric seems to like, is that we take a lesson from A Christmas Story and go out to eat for this holiday. (Yeah, in the movie it was Christmas, I know) Chinese, American buffet, Mexican food, the Indian restaurant if it's open - but something so we don't have to cook. How completely untraditional of us, I know, but a nice way to start our own tradition. Eating out, in a restaurant, is a real rarity around here, so that would be a treat for us, and something I think these boys would remember.

And I'd like to start the habit of spending New Year's Eve on the beach. Hotel rooms, from what I hear, are super-cheap that time of year, and I love nothing more than hearing the waves crash outside my window. Christmas we'll be in Missouri, for a visit, and we'll do that in the traditional way, probably at my mom's.

Real Men Cook

Because there are women out there whose husbands don't regularly cook for them, and I really want them to be jealous of the amazing cook I married, I thought I'd share this picture. Okay, that, and it's just really cute.

They were making Eric's famous cookies (which he really must stop making on such a regular basis, or I'm never going to lose those last 5 baby pounds - although we froze most of them, and right now any weight must be blamed on the Halloween candy). Tell me - this boy is beautiful, has blonde hair and blue eyes, is a little genius of course, and is already learning how to cook. Is he going to have more girlfriends than Hugh Hefner?

Happy Birthday!

My beautiful precious (not so) little girl turned 11 years old today.

I can't say much, except Happy Birthday to my little angel. I can't even begin to say how much I miss Samantha, and wish we could all be together for her birthday. And I can't believe she's 11.

Speechless

This is one of the most amazing things I have ever seen. I'm completely in awe. It caused a truly emotional reaction for me, and I don't know what else to say.

If you're curious, it is an artist, who creates works of art that are TINY. As in, the Statue of Liberty in the head of a pin.

If you haven't seen it before, click the link. It's mind-boggling. I have found another human being who I would be in awe of.

Staying home for Halloween

but feeling really guilty about it.

Started thinking about it this weekend. Eric has his long day on Tuesdays - goes to work by 8 in the morning and doesn't get home until after 7, so I'd be trying to do the whole trick-or-treat, or take the boys to the community center, by myself. Not impossible, but not exactly fun either.

Guthrie has no interest in Halloween. I've tried to get him excited about it, but he doesn't get it at all. I've told him he goes door to door getting candy, and he said, "I already had some." The library had a "practice run" at Story Hour last week, but after he went to the first station, that was all the candy he wanted. When someone tried to give him some more, he actually threw it out of his basket. He doesn't want to put on a costume, either.

Turner obviously doesn't care one lick about Halloween, or anything else. I've always thought it as pretty lame, too, when parents take tiny babies trick-or-treating. If they can't eat the candy, they shouldn't get any.

So, I think we've decided we're going to stay home and pass out candy tomorrow night. We're carving a pumpkin tonight, going to make some sort of Halloween treat, and after Story Hour this morning I'm taking the boys to buy candy. (We also have to get some long PJs and pants for Guthrie. It's still in the 70s and 80s during the day, but at night it drops into the 50s and gets downright chilly. If we keep the windows open at night, we don't need the a/c during the day.)

I love Halloween. I really, really do. I love dressing up in costumes, eating pumpkin seeds. So I feel bad about the fact that we're staying home, which is silly when these kids Just. Don't. Care.

I'm also very curious to see the celebrations for Days of the Dead. Always fascinated by the holiday, and looking forward to seeing it for myself.

Guthrie the jumper

Blogger won't let me embed video. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. So here's the link:

Okay, it still won't let me embed the video in a post. Don't know what the deal is - I'm copying the code straight from YouTube. But, it will let me add it to my template, so I did that. Just scroll all the way to the bottom of the page and the video should be there.

The little dude is absolutely fearless. The top step of the stool is 2 1/2 feet off the ground. I would jump from that high!

Turner, of course, thinks it's just about the funniest thing in the whole world, and totally cracks up at Guthrie jumping. The scary part will be when Turner can climb up the stool and tries to jump off, too.

What's My Age Again?

Maybe I need to keep this in mind for my marriage. We both took this quiz. Keep in mind, my husband is 17 years older than me. I'm 28, he's 45. My answers probably would have been mostly the same when I was 19, though, so I guess I've been about 30 for a long time.

My results:

You Are 29 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Eric's results.

You Are 20 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Beach bums

Ah, yes, it is a little chilly here today (chilly of course being a relative, subjective term. 64 degrees when I was in Alaska was often a rather warm day). But yesterday, Turner turned 6 months old, and we spent the day at the beach. After thinking about it, I realized it wasn't really worth going to Houston with Eric, spending 18 or so hours in the van with the boys over a 3 day period, and then spending half the weekend in the hotel room. So he's on his way to Houston, and I'm home with the boys (again).

But yesterday the beach was a blast, as always. My new goal in life is a beach house. Or a beach trailer. Or a beach cardboard box. I don't care.

Brrrr.

Did you see my little weather pixie over there? ---------------------------->

Yeah, she's not wearing a bikini. She's wearing JEANS!!!!

Woke up this morning and stepped out to get the paper and it was downright chilly. We have all our windows open, and the PJ shorts I slept in are almost too cold. Pulled down Guthrie's old wintery clothes for Turner, so he'll have some long pants, and realized I need to get Guthrie some jeans and sweats and things. And maybe I can wear some of my clothes from my closet.

And my motto was starting to be "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the Valley!"

I must confess

Eric makes the world's best cookies. Like crack on a cookie sheet. To make up for the fact that he left me alone with the kids for three days while he was hanging out with famous people and having his portrait done, he made cookies tonight, after replacing the van's battery (yes, he's SuperHusband and all that - you can't have him. You really wouldn't want him anyway, especially when he's in WriterMan mode).

A few weeks ago, our neighbors across the street brought us over a plate of cookies, a new recipe the wife had just tried. Being the neighborly type, we realized that since we had freshly made cookies, we should reciprocate. We had also borrowed their jumper cables, and needed to return those, so Eric took the plate of cookies over with the cables.

The confession? I asked him *not* to admit that he made the cookies.

(Where's a blushing emoticon would you need it?)

I don't know how the whole exchange went, but Eric assured me they think I'm a wonderful cookie maker.

Okay, really, we live on the Texas/Mexico border. The culture is a *little* different down here. Eric has repeatedly said he thinks I'm the whitest person in The Valley (which is not true - with his blue eyes, Guthrie definitely is). I don't think a working class Mexican family would get it that my husband comes home from his hard (3 hour) work day and makes cookies. So, they can think I make great cookies.

Because I did make some great cookies with Guthrie this weekend. With the help of this guy:

We're still stuck

My totally stupid "mechanical failure" of the weekend?

Battery is totally fried, needs to be replaced.

Died on Saturday, when we got home from the grocery story. Discovered on Sunday, when we were going to go to the park. Monday evening, friends came over to try to jump-start, but couldn't locate jumper cables. (Turns out they're in Eric's Volkswagen - in MISSOURI!!!!) Eric got home yesterday morning, borrowed some cables and tried to jump it this morning, but got nothing. On his way home from work he's going to get a new battery.

This means that I've been at home, with the boys, since Saturday afternoon. Between the weather (alternating between it raining out of nowhere and 100+ degree heat index), plus the fact that there really isn't anywhere close enough to walk (the library and park on a nice day, but not in this weather), and the mosquito problem which makes it miserable to be outside and makes it impossible to take walks along the canal by our house (and the fact that our lawn needs cut and we have a giant fire ant mound in it), we're going a little crazy. I also have overdue library books. :(

The van has to be fixed by this weekend, since we're going to Houston. Eric has a reading, Roz is coming, and it's just good to get out of The Valley sometimes.

Oh, and Karrie, as I've been unable to get to the post office, your package is going in the mail this afternoon, after Eric's class.

I'm adding this guy to the blogroll. I disagree with a lot of what he has to say, but I've found some of it interesting, especially his thoughts on homeschool.

I miss about Missouri

What (not who) I miss:

The Korean restaurant in Knob Noster, 'cause gods do I want me some kimchi right now. My mouth is watering like Pavlov's dogs just thinking about it. No Korean food in the Valley.

Korma Sutra. Yes it was an hour's drive, but so worth it. The Indian restaurant here (only one in the Valley) is mediocre at best.

Fall weather, because while I like warm weather and stuff, it's 80 degrees, right now, at almost 10 at night, and starting to feel kind of ridiculous.

Fall foliage, because palm trees don't turn orange and red and pretty. They just stay looking like palm trees.

Ummmm, I'm thinking really hard here to see if there's anything else I miss about Missouri ... still thinking ...

Yeah, without listing people I miss (which would be a shorter list than some might imagine, and is therefore why I won't list it), that's about it. Mostly, though, it's the kimchi.

Wasting time

since we're stuck at home.

You Are Mexican Food

Spicy yet dependable. You pull punches, but people still love you.

What Kind of Food Are You?

Absolutely accurate.

You Are 40% Paranoid Schizophrenic

You're pretty grounded, though you have your occasional paranoid moments. Just make sure to ignore those voices in your head!

Are You A Paranoid Schizophrenic?

Eh, okay.

Your Linguistic Profile:

70% General American English

20% Dixie

5% Yankee

0% Midwestern

0% Upper Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Funny, for a Midwesterner.

You Are Most Like George W. Bush

So what if you're not exactly popular? You still rule the free world. And while you may be quite conservative now, you knew how to party back in the day!

What Modern US President Are You Most Like?

WTF?

You Are 84% Bipolar

You have some serious ups and downs, maybe to the point of endangering your own life. Consult a doctor to see if you may truly have bipolar disorder.

Are You Bipolar?

Nothing like diagnosing mental illness through an online quiz. Lithium anyone?

D'oh!

I got all of us all ready to go to the park, diapers packed, cold water bottle, clothes changed, faces washed, kids strapped into their car seats in the van, keys in the ignition, started to turn it over, and ... Nothing. Nothing. Van won't start.

I immediately realized ... between the infant screaming as though a tiger were attacking, the sleeping toddler I wanted to get in the house without waking up, the groceries I had to unpack before they thawed out or otherwise spoiled, I totally forgot to turn the lights on the van off when we got home from the grocery store yesterday.

*sigh* I called Eric to tell him what a dumb-arse I am, and he suggested I ask Sam from across the street, the only neighbor we really know, to help. They're gone for the weekend. I might call friends later, but right now, we're going to make some cookies and stay home and I might let Guthrie watch a movie while I listen to the Chiefs game

*sigh*

Single Parenthood

I've rather suddenly become a single parent.

No, I didn't leave my husband. Rather, my husband left me.




















Okay, he's only left me for 3 days, but still. Did I have you going there? I didn't think so.

Eric is currently sitting on a flight to Los Angeles, where he'll be spending the next three days. What's he doing in LA? Going to parties. Hanging out with his oldest dearest childhood friends. Having his portrait done. And mostly, from what I can tell, not having two drooling, crying, diaper-wearing, puking, pooping, "Mommy please may I play the train game?" little ones hanging off of him. Which is exactly what I'm going to be doing all weekend.

Oh, yes, it's all technically "business," and "job-related," and all that jazz, but I think I want a job where I get to go to LA and hang out with famous people, and generally be child-free for a weekend.

Did I mention he was having his portrait done? By the artist who recently did the portrait of one rather well known, very hot new mama?

(Okay, I'm just jealous that he's going to be hanging out with someone who got to see Angelina Jolie naked. There's my confession.)

And the highlight of my weekend will be ... I was thinking of taking the boys to the zoo, but it's going to rain, and none of really slept well last night - Guthrie woke up at 4 in the morning asking me to change his diaper (!), and then Turner peed through his diaper and all over his onesie, the bedclothes, and I woke up in baby pee. Eric will be having cocktails, with friends and without babies, on Hollywood and Vine, and I will be eating El Pollo Loco and watching Wallace and Gromit (I promised Gutrie we would). Tomorrow, Eric will be at the Huntington Library with movie stars while I'm changing diapers and cutting grapes.

Is there no justice in the world?

When he gets home, I'm taking a nap. Yeah, that's right. He goes for a weekend without the family, and what do I ask for in return? A nap. A long nap, all by myself. Maybe even a long bath. Seems fair, huh?

Wish me luck.

Karma Chameleon

When I couldn't find Guthrie today, I located him in my bathroom, very quietly applying blush with an eyeshadow brush all over himself. He was very proud. Sweet little thing. I figure why not - we've painted his toenails too!



And then he thought Turner needed his done, too, so he did Turner's with a marker.

More Cars.

To continue:

This is Mack:

And here, left to right, are The King, Lightning McQueen, some random race car, Thomas the Tank Engine (he needs gas too!), another random race car, Chick Hicks, and Luigi. They are all at the gas station, filling up before the big race. They also all take their turns on the train set in the background.


Sally is apparently lost somewhere in this giant mess of a car collection. This big bin is almost completely full of cars, mostly thanks to his Uncle Mitch.

Cars!

We try, for a variety of reasons, to avoid too much commercialism, especially for the kids, and to limit exposure to licensed, branded, franchised toys and characters. I could go into depth explaining why, but that's not my point right now, and if you're really curious, I'll direct you here. My guess is you're either already on board with this idea, or you don't really care and it wouldn't make much of a difference anyway, so I'm not going to waste my virtual breath right now.

One of our reasons, though, is that we believe it encourages imagination and creativity. Toys with too specific of a purpose, or very strong associations can be very limiting - you only play with it in the way you are "supposed to," and that doesn't really require much thought. The more simple and basic the toy, the more things you can do with it, the more creative you're going to be with it.

We've seen lots of evidence this seems to be working with Guthrie lately. This past summer, we took him to see the Disney movie Cars. While he does have a little tiny actual toy model of both Lightning McQueen and Doc Hudson, he loses them a lot, and is really much more interested in the models he's found in his own giant box of cars (thanks Mitch!). He does ask for the licensed stuff when we see it in the stores, but he doesn't go overboard, and it's not a battle at all.

What he has done is find, in the box of cars he already had, models that he has assigned to be the cars from the movie. It started with a blue race car that actually did look amazingly like The King. Then he found other race cars, and one became Lightning, and another - a green one - Chick Hicks. His model VW bus, when not being called "Uncle Mitchell's Bus," is Fillmore. A green car with flames is Ramone, an older silver car is Doc. His red Coca-Cola truck is Mack, and my personal favorite, the tow-truck we bought him in Mexico, is Tow-Mater. There is also a black Porsche that has been assigned to be Sally, although I think Eric helped him figure that one out. And the big plastic car is Luigi. My favorite, though, without a doubt is his "gas station." It's part of his train set, and is supposed to be, I assume, a platform for waiting for the trains. I never would have thought to make it a gas station, but that's exactly what it is, and what he did.

Unfortunately, for some reason, I can't get all the pics to load into this post. So, see the post above, or below, or however it ends up showing on the page, to get it all figured out.

Ramone and Doc:

Tow-Mater:

Fillmore:

Pictures

Check out what we got from our tree. Yes, it's a lemon. From our lemon tree. How cool is that? Course, we can't actually eat it, because the white flies got to it first, but we did at least get a lemon.

This is amazing. Check him out. He sleeps. By himself. Alone. For more than 15 minutes. He obviously didn't learn this from his brother.

And I took about a thousand great pictures of Eric and Turner yesterday, but since I can't post them all, here are 3 of my favorites:

Feeling like a bad mom

I know I'm not actually a bad mom, but sometimes I feel like a total bum.

Right now, Guthrie is playing Thomas the Tank Engine games on the laptop, while I work at the computer. (Yes, I know blogging isn't really working, but I did have actual work to do, I'm just done now. Just because I SAH doesn't mean I don't have actual work to do on the computer.) Turner is napping.

I've been letting Guthrie play on the computer too much lately, but he hasn't been watching any movies at all, and I do figure the computer is the lesser of two evils, because it's not entirely passive. Yes, he's on a commercial site, and is getting addicted to Thomas (I realized why we were so dead-set against licensed toys walking through Wal-Mart the other day - "Look Mom, there's Thomas! It's Dora! Lightning McQueen!").

The mosquitoes are so bad right now it's miserable to play outside. This September was apparently one of the wettest on record here, and there were several individual rainfalls that set records. And areas were flooded, there is lots and lots of standing water, which of course equals mosquitoes.

Unlike the mosquitoes that I'm used to in Missouri, these things bite all day and night. Doesn't matter when you leave the house, you are going to get eaten. Just walking to and from the van to go to the store I've had 10 bites! It's worse on the boys, too, because Turner obviously can't swat them off, and Guthrie usually doesn't realize they're there, and then he scratches his bites until they bleed!

I don't want to cover them in insect repellant, either, even though I have some Burt's Bees. So, we haven't really been going outside. It's not worth it to come inside covered in bites (and I do mean covered - I've counted 20 or 30 on myself at any given time lately).

I hope this is going to end soon, but it's been really rainy lately, and the forecast is calling for rain just about every day. It's so bad that I've found mosquitoes living, flying around in the house. I sat down to use the bathroom and heard that buzz! I'm certain that's what wakes Turner up from his naps sometimes - there are almost always a couple in the bedroom lately.

Maybe we should cover the whole house in a giant mosquito net?

I'm going to get off the computer and try to steal the laptop away from Guthrie. He really would play on it all day if I let him. We've got to figure out ways to be more "active" while staying inside, or at least not getting eaten alive!

Lost without Lost

We don't have cable. Haven't in the whole time Eric and I have been together. Don't really miss it at all. I'm glad we don't have a TV where we can watch it (it's in the garage, unplugged.)

I do have one TV show I'm slightly addicted to though - Lost. Stupid, lame, cheesy as all hell, but I love it. It's pure escapism, and that's what I want out of TV. Samantha and I used to sit together on Wednesday nights, tuen out the rest of the world, and get caught up in Sawyer, Hurley, Jack, Claire, Kate, and Sayid (aw ... swoon ... Sayid).

My computer can tune TV stations, so we bought a little set of rabbit ears to try to tune it in. But, I don't get enough of a signal to really be able to watch. I tried last week, and could make out enough to be able to tell what's going on, except in the dark scenes with Jack. This week, though, I was putting the boys to bed, and didn't get enough of a signal for the computer to record. So I'm sitting here with no clue what happened to any of them. Where are Locke and Desmond? How's the baby? And Sayid - where's Sayid? (With his much older girlfriend?)

I'm debating whether I should buy it from iTunes. I don't really like their policy with video downloads, that there is no way to burn it and watch it anywhere other than on your computer. But at the same time, I really want to watch Lost, and don't want to wait for the whole thing to come out on DVD.

I think I remember hearing you can watch it on ABC's website, and I might try that. My only concern there is whether I have to just watch it all, then, at once, which is darn near impossible with 2 little ones, or if I can download it to watch later, or how it works. I'll check it out.

In the meantime, NO SPOILERS PLEASE!!!!!!!! If I can't get to watch it, then I'll ask for an update. For now, I'll survive.

The Sweetest Thing

Yesterday morning, as I was trying to get all ready to leave for the store, Guthrie was playing in his room, and I laid Turner down on the living room floor to go do a couple things in the kitchen. I was unloading the dishwasher when Turner started fussing, and since I was almost done I thought I'd just go ahead and see if I could finish before he had a total meltdown. He was terribly fussy yesterday anyway, and it really didn't seem to matter what I did.

Guthrie apparently heard Turner fussing and ran in from his bedroom. He lay down on the floor next to Turner, put his arms around him, talked to him softly, and Turner calmed down. They lay there together for a few minutes, Turner staring and smiling at his big brother, Guthrie smiling and making faces at his little brother, holding hands, completely unaware that anyone was watching them. I wished I'd been able to get it on camera, but then Guthrie would have known I was watching, and gone after the camera instead.

It was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen in my life.

Guthrie is, mostly, an amazing big brother to Turner. Yes, he gets mad when Turner wants to play with his toys, or when he wants on my lap when I'm nursing Turner. Mostly, though, he wants to calm him down when he's upset, and is careful not to let him get anything he could hurt himself on, and if Turner is playing with a toy Guthrie wants or shouldn't have, Guthrie will take it away (sometimes gently, sometimes not) and replace it with something more appropriate.

He also wants to share with everyone. When he's eating his food, he'll try to feed me bites, or when we make a meat and cheese tray he'll fix up little sandwiches for Eric and me. And the other day when Turner and I were napping, Eric said it was all he could do to keep Guthrie out of the bedroom, because he found one of Turner's toys and was certain Turner needed it right that second.

He's a sweet, sweet kid. We must be doing something right.

Those Un-Socialized, Miseducated Homeschooled Freaks

http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory?id=2510880

I'll have lots more to say about the whole homeschooling issue when I have a chance, but here's an article talking about how many colleges are actively recruiting homeschoolers. And I'm sure that's because they don't have adequate social skills and are getting an inferior education. @@

Yes, I'm planning to homeschool my two little boys. My husband, the college English professor, is just as enthusiastic about this as I am. We have researched it. We already know what our plan is, and have since before Guthrie was born. We feel confident that we can do it. I'm not worried about "not having a life" or my boys not having friends. My only concern, honestly, is finding other homeschoolers in this area who are not doing so for religious reasons.

?

And can anyone tell me why the wireless internet connection using the laptop is SO MUCH FASTER than the connection on my computer? It all goes through the same thing. But the laptop just FLIES! I think Gus can have my computer, and I'm taking this one. Better screen, faster speed. And I can use it anywhere.

Another quiet Sunday

I'm starting to rather enjoy our relatively quiet, uneventful Sundays. Eric and Guthrie are currently at the grocery store, getting some sushi (Sushi Sundays!), fruit, and miscellaneous other goodies to stock the cabinets and fridge. Turner is doing the most amazing thing, which he has been doing all week - napping. All. By. Himself! And he has been, for over 4 HOURS!!!!!! Yes, this kid is certainly a gift from one of the gods (is there a god of sleep?) to make up for the little sleep demon who is the Guthrie. I even took a long nap with him - about 2 hours - while Eric took care of Guthrie, finished writing his book review, and even picked up all the toys and straightened up the living room! Is it my birthday?

I'm sitting and listening to the Chiefs (down 17-10 at halftime) and typing away on the laptop. Why the laptop? We pulled it out to the living room so Gus could bomb around on it while Eric and I tried to get stuff done, but instead Guthrie wanted to use my computer, and so I'm using this one. Whatever works.

I've been having the most bizarre dreams lately. I've always been one to have weird dreams, but I think I haven't been getting enough regular long stretches of sleep to have that many strange dreams. The night before last I dreamt of a horse giving birth (very scary, actually - my Chinese zodiac animal is the horse), dreamt last night of giant boxes of Goldfish crackers and of our lawn, which we just had mowed a few days ago, being 3 feet tall in places. And the weirdest - I was Kate Hudson, had just been on a date with Burt Reynolds, and was driving back into Warrensburg from our old house when I realized Burt was following me, and so decided to pick up my cell phone to call my good friend George Clooney to see what I should do.

WTF?

If I'm going to dream of celebrities, couldn't I at least have been on the date with George Clooney? Or even better - Joaquin Phoenix or Johnny Depp?

Our nights now - bedtime -are much better. I take the boys in and lay down (lie down? never can get those right) between them and we read stories. Turner nurses, listens to stories, inevitably fusses a little bit, but then falls asleep, and I curl up to Guthrie and keep reading stories for awhile. Some nights we read for two hours, but I don't mind, and Guthrie loves it. He does the funniest thing though - if I turn to look at one of the boys while I'm reading, and keep talking and finish the sentence I'm reading, he'll get mad at me and say "I'm not a word!" Too, too funny.

And since bedtime has gotten easier, and better, and Guthrie at the age of 2 1/2 finally sleeps mostly through the night by himself, and Turner sleeps long stretches without needing anyone there, I've started to be able to stay up at night and spend some time with my husband, like a grownup. Last night I think it was 1:30 before I went to bed, after Turner woke up and when I picked him up he pooped all over both of us. It's not so bad - before the poopfest I got to have two whole glasses of wine (Yellow Tail Shiraz if you're curious) with my husband, and I finally got him to agree with me on a point I've been arguing for, oh, almost the entire 5 years we've been together.

Turner is awake, I'm not doing enough of my part to root on the Chiefs, so I must go.

Luna-tic

Eric is now convinced, and almost has me convinced, that I go a little crazy with the full moon. Because I was, uh, a little crazy yesterday. Like as in the pile of dishes in the sink seemed like an insurmountable task, and the fact that Guthrie took two hours to go to sleep seemed like some sort of punishment from the gods. And today I am totally fine. Well, mostly. I was a little bonkers that Guthrie, after going to bed at 10:00, woke up at 5:30, but other than that - fine!

So I'm going to have to pay attention for this, and see if there's any truth to it. After all, I am a Cancer, and the ruling planet is the Moon.

Goodbye, Buck

Kansas City's finest citizen, Negro League star and all around fine man Buck O'Neil has passed. He fell one vote short of the Baseball Hall of Fame in this past year's vote. Thank you, Buck, and you will be missed.

Brotherly Love

Aren't they sweet? Doesn't Guthrie look like a great big brother?

Ah, yes. Of course, this was snapped immediately before Guthrie decided to let go of Turner, who then proceeded to fall flat on his face on the carpet, and then roll over with that look of, "What the heck just happened?" Which is why we have no intention of putting in the nice tile flooring until the boys are much, much older.

Duh, duh duh duh, dumb

Okay, so apparently I'm an idiot and the video I tried to embed didn't work. And I was so freakin' proud of myself for figuring out how to do it.

Anyone want to give me some tech tips and tell me what I did wrong? Really, I'm not that computer illiterate.

UPDATE: I got it to work, sort of. Now it's huge, though, and screwing up my template.

Ah, well. It's not that exciting. I'll leave it up for now, then take it back down to fix mylayout.

I swear I'm doing it right - Eric and I are having a very bad tech week.

Go Chiefs

I'm managing to have a chance to sit down and update this thing right now because Guthrie has been begging me all morning to watch The Pink Panther, and I've told him all morning that as soon as the football game started, he could watch it. So, as soon as I got my computer all ready and tuned to the Kansas City station so I could listen to the Chiefs game, he asked again for The Pink Panther. And so I told him I'd get in ready for him in just a second, and he ran off. I went looking for him, and found him - playing happily in his room!!!!! While I will certainly let him watch the Panther when he asks again, because I said he could, I'm sure as hell not going to remind him he wanted to watch TV. Especially when he's playing. Happily. In His Room!

Did I mention that I love love love my high-speed internet, so I can listen to my football team playing when it's not going to be on any local radio? So what if the Chiefs are 0-for so far, and Trent Green is out for now - I'm still going to listen. And Turner, Guthrie and I are all wearing our Chiefs gear today, too. (I married an Oakland man, who won't wear Chiefs red. Meanie.)

And now, less than 10 real-time minutes into the game, KC is up 7-0. Maybe that's the secret - I just need to blog about the game for them to win.

So, sing it with me now:

"O'er the land of the free, and the home of the CHIEFS!"

Little Lucy

This is the news today, fitting in with my theme from yesterday. A new human ancestor fossil found. Now, I don't know how they can find fossils 3+million years old when, according to a large portion of the population of Kansas, the earth is only 6,000 years old, but I still find this interesting.

I haven't had a chance to read and make any sense out of it yet. Our household is currently passing around a late summer cold/flu, and my head is pounding so hard that I'm having trouble even walking straight. I feel hungover, without the benefit of having enjoyed the drunken reveling that usually preceds a hangover.

I was looking at the pictures of her in our local newspaper, and Guthrie came up, curious. I tried to explain it to him, but he just asked, "Is it sharp?" and then closed that section of the newspaper, telling me it was scary. Okay, no little budding paleontologist there.

Lucy in the Sky

I'm ticked.

Eric's old e-mail address is still valid, and he got a message earlier that made me very mad. My favorite former professor, John Sheets, was announcing a guest speaker on campus. Who, you might ask?

Oh, just Donald Johanson!!!

I leave Warrensburg, and one of the very few people who I'm totally fascinated by comes to speak. Life=not fair.

Instead of listening to him speak, and getting him to sign his new book (which we've already gotten a copy of, although I've not had a chance to look at it), I'll just listen to "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" and think of what I'm missing.

Sad. So sad.

We also found out CMSU is not CMSU anymore. Nope, now instead of Central Missouri State University it is the University of Central Missouri. The only apparent advantage I can see to this is it lost its unfortunate initials, and we'll have to be given a new nickname, instead of Call Me Stupid University .

(And, although I haven't moved to Beta yet, I'm having trouble leaving posts on some people's {Karrie's and Jill's} blogs. Could be on my end though)

Don't worry, I'm not selling the kids on eBay

Or the husband for that matter. Although this week - as you could probably figure out from the last post - did make both of those options sound tempting at one point or another.

And, for the record, it was indeed the completely insane blonde woman of the house (uh, me) who decided to skip birth control and let Mother Nature take its course. I won't flog myself, or listen to Vogon Poetry. (After marrying a writer, and attending lots of poetry and fiction readings, the Vogon poetry took on new meaning for me. I've heard a couple dreadful poetry readings, but also some very, very good ones)

(And to go completely off, I just realized it's 9:30 at night, dark out, but I can hear someone's lawn mower. I guess that's one way to beat the heat. How bizarre)

So, of course, I love my little ones more than anything. This week, for some reason, was very very hard on me though. I can't really tell you exactly why - it's all just a big blur for some reason. I know there wasn't much sleeping involved, and I know that one night when Guthrie had been awake for 2 HOURS already and it was about 4 a.m., and he'd succeeded in waking up Turner (but not Daddy), I lost my temper with him and wasn't exactly the best AP positive parenting mama around. Why exactly I thought yelling at a child would make him go to sleep I don't know. Yes, I had one of my worst parenting moments then.

The toys everywhere, the diapers, the endless repetitions of Richard Scarry stories, the constant preparing of snacks and having to pull down my shirt to feed the little one, the messes - it all got to me. Why this week? I don't know, it really wasn't any different. I was really feeling like we'd been insane - genuinely diagnosably insane - to have two kids so close together, even though it's how we planned it.

I'm feeling much better now. Eric let me take a nap this afternoon, and made cookies, to fatten me back up make me feel better.

I am much more certain now, though, that this IUD is staying in for the full five years, and then I'll only think of more babies if Mary Poppins can live in the garage.

What were we thinking?

Whoever thought it would be a good idea to forego birth control, let Mother Nature make the decision, and allow us to conceive a baby and have two little boys just 25 months apart needs to be flogged, repeatedly.

Or made to listen to Vogon poetry.

Where Were You ...

For a long time I was afraid the "Where Were You" moment of our generation was going to be something sadly representative of our generation, such as

- when the OJ Verdict was read? (At a prenatal appointment for Samantha at Bassett Army Community Hospital in Fort Wainwright, Alaska)

- when you found out about Kurt Cobain's death? (in my bedroom at home watching the news)

- when you heard Princess Diana had died? (I'd just been picked up from work by my ex-husband and his best friend, and they told me)

- when you heard (or watched) the Challenger explosion? (I'd just gotten home from school - first grade - and saw on the news. The older grades watched it live, but we weren't told about it. I'd wanted to be an astronaut up until that moment)

We all realize now that that moment for us, the moment that defines people now the way JFK or Martin Luther King Jr. (my parents found out about MLK's death when they arrived at the hotel for their honeymoon. He was probably being assassinated as they were saying their vows) was the previous generation, is 9/11.

And why do we feel the need to tell these stories? Why must we repeat our own tale of when we heard, what we saw, especially those of us who had no real connection to the event? Unity in crisis? A form of healing - what is it exactly?

I was working at the Revenue Office of Central Missouri State University. I had to call home for some reason and my then-roommate, Chris, said they'd just bombed the World Trade Center. At that moment it didn't mean much, then my boss came up and started telling us more details, we all began checking websites, and he brought up a portable radio so we could listen.

As the day went on, reports were varied and mostly inaccurate, at least by word of mouth - a rumor of a car bomb somewhere, and I was a victim of the gas-shortage rumors, and had to leave work early to be certain I had enough to make it home.

Just a few months later - New Year's Eve - I was in NYC, at the home of some of Eric's friends who lived in Battery Park City, overlooking Ground Zero. They described watching the planes hit out their window, the fears that the tower would fall on their building, and their trying to escape to safety until they knew it was okay to return. Then I met another friend, who was with his son on the last train to go under the WTC as the planes hit. And we were there, half-drunk on the streets, on our honeymoon, on 3/11/02 when the towers of light were first lit. We listened as everyone told their stories then.

It's still horrifying to watch. Our kids, though, won't get it. They will be so used to it, will have seen it over and over on the screens, the way we've seen JFK go down and Jack Ruby take out Lee Harvey Oswald, that it won't ever be real to them. They won't have the fear, the sadness, the longing for the world to return to the way it was on 9/10/01.

My son, though, saw the picture on the newspaper - one tower in flames and the other plane about to strike - and he knew. He turned the paper over, so he didn't have to look. He is only 2 1/2, but he still knew.

I don't have any great words of wisdom. It's all been said. But in the same way my mom's family was so in awe of the first moon landing that they took a picture of the screen, I had to say my peace, too.

This is why I can never get any work done

Yep, apparently I'm a human jungle gym. And my computer is the most fascinating thing in the world.

I was sitting trying to do something that should have been fairly simple (add music to my iPod, which actually turned into a nightmare, but that's a different story), and Guthrie climbed all over me. And stayed there. And I was afraid if we moved, he'd fall, so I was kind of stuck. Fun, fun, fun.

I did manage to get it done, though, and Eric set up my speakers in the living room, so I can listen to MY music in the living room and dance with the kids. Maybe I'll get rid of these last 10 pounds that way.

Should I add now, after showing this pic, that Gus can almoststand on his head, and hangs from the bunk bed? Gymnastics in the spring, maybe?

We've been Tagged

by Abby and Davis. Well, Turner has been tagged that is.

3 Things That Scare Me
*When Guthrie yells
*When I wake up and can't find a boob
*When Guthrie walks over me to make himself a "tunnel" for me

3 People That Make Me Laugh
*Guthrie
*Daddy
*Mommy (I don't really know anybody else yet)

3 Things I Love
*My swing
*my orange monkey
*boobs

3 Things I Hate
*having gas
*dirty diapers
*long car trips

3 Things I Don't Understand
*why Guthrie yells
*what's so special about trains
*Nascar

3 Things On My Desk/Table (or blanket)
*an orange stuffed monkey
*a Kermit the Frog rattle
*Yellow maracas

3 Things I Am Doing Right Now
*rolling over
*playing with my toes
*reaching for toys

3 Things I Want to Do Before I Die
*eat a strawberry
*play with Guthrie's toys
*wear underwear

3 Things I Can Do
*smile
*cry loud and long
*nurse

3 Things I Can't Do
*crawl
*sit up
*eat strawberries

3 Things I Think You Should Listen To
*My theme song
*Mommy makes me listen to this, and we dance
*Daddy likes this

3 Things I Think You Should Never Listen To
*Her
*Them
*Him

3 Absolute Favorite Foods
*Boobs
*Breastmilk
*Chi-chis

3 Beverages I Drink Regularly
*Mama's milk
*Mama's milk
*Mama's milk

3 Shows I Watched as a Kid
*X-Files with Mommy and Daddy
*Wallace and Gromit with Guthrie
*That's all - we don't have TV, just a DVD player

3 Babies I Tag
Julian
Cheraya
Zoe

I'm still here

I just haven't had anything interesting to say lately. Or at least I haven't had anything interesting to say at the same time that I've been at the computer and had both of my hands free to actually say it (or, as is the case, type it).

There have been some interesting comments lately by Karrie and Amanda, as well as Thordora about being a Mom-Who-Blogs-About-Her-Child(ren)-and-Mommyhood, and what group aforementioned Moms you fall into. While I certainly don't give this blog enough time or energy right now to really put myself into that Blogging Mama group, it has caused me to look back at life in general and try to see where I fit. And I've also seen that I may just be one of those moms, those moms who have thrown themselves so completely into being the best mom they could be that they've lost the real sense of themself. I think it's largely due to the mistakes I made with my daughter, mostly due to bad advice and not being confident enough in myself to do what I thought was right. (Well, that, and the deadbeat ex-husband who wouldn't get off his butt and get a job, which left me in the position of trying to be primary breadwinner, mom, wife, and actually use the full scholarship I'd earned.)

This is what I've been thinking about lately. I think it's why I'm so desperate to get back into school, to actually have the time to read a whole book (I have several scattered around that I glance over a page or two when I get a chance), and why it feels like such a thrill to get (!) to go to the grocery store by myself. My mom started asking me to give her ideas for Christmas, and the boys' sizes, and I realized I couldn't think of a single thing I want, just things I want for the kids, or for the family. Nothing just for me.

Except time. Time would be good. Time alone, time with my husband, time to try out a new recipe, or read a book, or lounge in a bath. Time to write in my journal, or write something here, or time to go check out a movie. Time. For Christmas, someone give me some time.

I love my babies, of course, but sometimes, I just want to look in the mirror and see JUDY again, not just "Mama."

I realize it's next to impossible right now, with a 4-month-old who won't even take a bottle and doesn't yet sleep through the night (and if he's anything like his brother, won't for a long damn time), but I have to remind myself that it will happen (as long as the IUD works. Please FSM let the IUD work!). And it will be here soon, too soon. As long as Judy stays in there somewhere, I'll revive her when I can.

It's just one of my fantasies right now, along with being able to shop for clothes without thinking about whether or not I can nurse in them, and being able to eat an entire pb&j without having to give up half of it to a 2-year-old.

This is too funny. What right-wingers see when they read the New York Times. Scroll over the headlines and pictures.

My dear sweet husband was so kind as to remind me this morning that not only will UTPan-Am likely not accept all of my transfer credits because colleges usually don't take all of your transfers, but also because a lot of times they won't take credits that are past a certain time frame, and mine are going on 10 years now for some.

Thanks Eric! How sweet of you to make sure I realize that not only has it been 10 years in January since I started college and I'm only a sophomore, but when I go back to school I'll probably only be a freshman. Oh, yes, and what was that - you have 5 degrees? (No, he didn't say that, just my internal insecurity dialogue)

I've been thinking about school a lot. I don't think I'll be ready for spring semester, but hopefully by next fall. And as Karrie recommended, I might try doing some online classes, at least for basics. And see if I can test out of anything, especially things that won't transfer.

My goal is still basically get a degree before any of my kids, which should give me 12 years. I should be able to manage that, right?

Apparently the Anthropology program here is pretty good, although I'm going to start back just taking classes I want to, like the 2nd part of Art History, and Economics, maybe Psychology. At this point I'm not out for a career, but an education, so I'll take it slow and easy until I figure it out.

4 Months!

First, I have no idea why that lost post screwed up my template. The html looks okay, to me at least. Weird. I'm curious if a new post will fix it, or if I have to wait for it to be archived.

Anyway, T-Maw (yeah, it's a stupid nickname) had his 4 month appointment today. The stats:

16 pounds, 8 ounces, 26 inches

And hours of crying after his shots.

Poor thing. Although I think the shots are really harder on Mom than on Baby, because we know what's coming.

Comparison to Guthrie at 4 months: 1 inch shorter, and exactly the same weight. Funny, since Guthrie started off over a pound heavier.

And our Ped, who Eric hasn't even met yet, went on and on about how we could start solid food anytime now. Give him some cereal, she said. When I told her we plan on waiting, she acted like I was the first person in the world who'd ever done so. I think I probably am a rarity down here, all around. But she kept going on. "How long do you plan on waiting?" "Why wait?"

Okay, you're the Ped. Doesn't the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) recommends exclusive breastfeeding for 6 months, then gradual intro of solids. So what's the big deal? Aargh!

I don't think she likes me.

And we've decided to really, truly, officially wean Guthrie. Eric has started putting him to bed at night. Last night it was 10:00 before he passed out. It's currently 9:30, and he's not asleep yet. But he's not screaming, which is what he was doing when I was trying to put him to bed. Screaming, and banging his head on the door trying to get out.

We also broke down and bought one of those portable DVD players with the little 7-inch screen. Yes, I know it seems like a complete and total waste of money when we already had a perfectly good TV and DVD player, and when both of our computers will play DVDs. But sometimes I need Guthrie to chill for a bit so that I can feel like a normal human being, or I need to have the "No Nap Today - OR EVER" child occupied so that the smaller infant, who DOES nap and needs more than, say, 17 minutes of sleep a day, can actually get some rest without Guthrie coming over and proudly waking him up.

And the portable player seemed like a good idea because a) it's portable, and can be put away, and so none of us will be tempted to turn it on in the middle of the day and just be veggies all day; b) it only plays DVDs, so we can't get sucked into soap operas or the news; c) it could be taken with us on long drives, like back to Missouri, so that there's something to keep the non-sleeping child occupied while we drive for what feels like weeks at a time; and d) it can be watched anywhere, any room of the house, or wherever we want to take it.

So he gets one movie a day. (Usually) That's not so bad.

Eric and I have also started watching the X-Files DVDs we bought. So. Much. Fun. I'd forgotten how much I loved the X-Files. And not just because David Duchovny's hot (he is). Just about bit Eric's head off when he suggested we skip forward and watch specific episodes - uh, no. We're watching in order. I still don't know how it ended, and won't until we get through 9 seasons.

Any predictions for how long it will take us? We've finished 3 episodes so far.

Yeah, I'm in total stream-of-consciousness mode. I have no idea what I've said. Must. Get. Sleep.

I'm debating whether I want to take classes in the spring. I don't know if I'll be ready to leave both kids with Eric for long stretches of time like that. And I freakin' hate pumping, and don't want to have to pump milk for Turner. I may wait until next fall. I just want to get my degree before one of my kids does.

Math Relays

Some of my best memories of are math relays. Yes, I was a nerd. What did I do for fun on a Saturday morning? Get up at the crack of dawn, pack my bag full of cards, pencils, notebooks, over-processed snack foods, grab a soda and a pillow, and show up to meet the bus. Then we'd ride somewhere so we could take math tests.

Sounds like a great time, huh?

Seriously, there was something about being on the bus, with a bunch of other nerds, and doing our own version of competing. I wasn't athletic, or artistic, or able to compete in any other way, but man, was I good at math. (Apparently still am, since I caught a significant error in dh's checkbook today)

I will admit, without bragging too much, that I have many, many math relay medals and ribbons in my keepsake box. Of course, the one I remember the most is the 4th place I got at Smith-Cotton one year. 4th place. 3rd and better got to go to state. If I'd only known the quadratic formula I would have gone to state. And then there's the fact that the same person - from the 'Burg at that! - always beat me. Or at least that's how I remember it. Beat me in speech competition too. And to something else. Thought about linking to her profile, but decided against it. With good reason.

A lot of people really disliked word problems. I, on the other hand, enjoyed them, and did pretty well with them. All of this came to me earlier, when I was trying to get both boys down for a nap at the same time. I wanted to write a new math relay test, one for moms.

So, get out your #2 pencils, your solar powered graphing calculators*, and get ready to fill in some bubbles, 'cause it's math relay time!

Question #1:

Guthrie is 29 months old and needs approximately 47 minutes of sleep in any 24-hour period. Turner is 4 months old and needs much more sleep than this in a day. Judy is their 28-year-old mother, who would like to take a nap with them. If Guthrie wants to nurse to sleep for his nap, and Turner needs to be bounced to sleep for his, and Judy just wants a little bit of rest, should she drink the merlot or the cabernet?

Question #2:

Turner wears size 3 diapers, and goes through an economy size box in 16 days. Guthrie wears a size 6 diaper and his boxes last a little longer, 21 days. If they both wear the HEB store brand with Clifford and cute little bones on them, will Guthrie ever decide to potty train?

Question#3:

Judy and Eric are a happily married couple. They love their children, cook healthy yummy meals, and see their dentists fairly regularly. If both boys co-sleep, and Guthrie's train set has taken over the entire living room instead of his bedroom, why did they buy a 3-bedroom house?

Question #4:

Eric's brother has nicknamed Guthrie G-Mitch, since his middle name (Mitchell) is after Eric's brother. This is a cute nickname from his uncle. Turner has 2 middle names, and his initials are TMAW. Judy has begun calling him by those initials as a nickname - T-maw. Is this the silliest nickname ever?

Question #5:

If Eric announces, at 10:51 p.m. on a Wednesday, that he wants more babies, and Judy's response is "Screw you," to which he promptly replies, "Well, yeah, that's how it works," should she have another glass of merlot? Or should she just drink the whole bottle?


Time's UP! Turn in your papers and go to the gym to play the dot square game, some Gameboy, and eat some nachos while you wait for your results. The awards ceremony will be at noon.

*At some point in high school my friend Tonya and I discovered that we could pass notes back and forth on her graphing calculator. It always looked like we were working, but instead we were just using the alphabet feature to pass notes. I've heard you can also use them to store formulas to cheat on tests, though, so I'll have to change my earlier statement and ban graphing calculators from this test.

I just want to say a great big congratulations to my niece, Stacia, who got her driving permit today.

I can't believe it's possible that my little Boo-Boo Bear is driving. Although she does have some pretty cool wheels now - take care of the Cougar, I miss it sometimes!

I love you Stacia. Be careful. Be safe. Congrats!

One-handed typing is limiting. So I'm quizzing, thanks to Callie.

Your Political Profile:

Overall: 10% Conservative, 90% Liberal

Social Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

How Liberal Or Conservative Are You?

You Are 68% Lady

Overall, you are a refined lady with excellent manners. But you also know when to relax and not get too serious about etiquette

Are You A Lady?

I think that's about right.

Although the picture looks like a bit of a lush. Which I've been known to be.

Yummm, champagne.

Weaning? Ha!

It's now been about four hours since I announced, about as publicly as can be, that I'm going to try to wean Guthrie. And how's it going? Well, he woke up from his nap, cranky, and after trying for about 10 minutes to get him interested in something else, he pleaded, "Please may you nurse me so I will feel better?"

I gave in.

I'm weak.

Weak.

Mama wuss.

He's nursing as I type.

Weak.

I didn't desert this thing. Just between my mom and Samantha's visit, and Guthrie's new fascination with the computer, I just haven't had much of a chance to sit down at the computer. Well, I have, but it usually escalates into a fight between me and Guthrie:

"I want to press the moon button."

"No, Guthrie, you may not press the button."

"But I want to."

"You can't always have what you want."

"I want to."

"I know you want to. You may not. Mommy needs to finish this ..."

Moon button pressed, computer in hibernate, Mommy very frustrated. Keyboard and mouse get put away where Guthrie can't reach.

And remember how I talked about how well both boys were sleeping? Ha! You think Guthrie can sleep well, for an extended period of time? In your dreams. Okay, in my fantasies. Turner still sleeps like a dream, but Gus? Nightmare. I'm also thinking I'm ready to wean him. Yep, he's 29 months, and I think I've had enough. He only nurses at bedtime, and during the day I think I can handle that. Then bedtime rolls around and I dread it. So, we're working on giving it up. I'll keep you posted.

So the moral of the story is uninterrupted computer time has gotten hard to come by. I don't know how it's working right now, honestly.

I think of brilliant, witty things to write when I'm in the shower, or driving to the store. Then I actually get logged in to my blog, and I'm lucky if I can get to the "create new post" page before the fight begins.

We're thinking we're going to have to set the TV up after all. I'm about to lose my mind (completely) getting no time to do anything. I mean anything. 1,000 miles from family, no babysitter we trust yet, and a 2 year old who doesn't believe in sleep. The TV would at least buy me a few minutes here and there to do something with my time other than dishes and laundry. And with two adults, a 2 year old, and an infant, sometimes it feels like there's not much more to life than dishes and laundry.

We did go to the beach while my mom and Sammie were here. I wore my pretty dress we bought in Progreso. See:

Behold, the power of ...


To keep up the trend set by Amanda and Alimum, as well as others, I'm sure, I'm going to honor World Breastfeeding Week with a few nursing pictures myself.

First, one of my favorite pictures, taken minutes after Guthrie's birth:

Me nursing Turner at my 10 year class reunion:

And tandem nursing both boys. Not my favorite pic, and definitely not as beautiful as one I saw on the Feeding Choices Board, but the only decent one I have.

All I have for now. And since my mom and Samantha are visiting, and I'm trying to spend as much time with them as possible, I don't have any wonderful words of wisdom for the day. Except that it still amazes me to see these little bundles and know I kept them alive for 9 months in, and then 6+ months out, by my milk alone. Pretty cool, huh? Nature is a beautiful thing.